Saturday, January 28, 2012

Little Miss Independent

Dear Isis,

You are changing and growing so much lately! In the last few months, you have grown 3+ inches and you've grown even more than that if I measured attitude and personality in inches and pounds! You are so like me and your daddy. Independent, feisty, opinionated, but also sweet, sensitive and caring. You are apprehensive at first around new people, choosing to sit back and wait before joining in on the fun. This is more me than your dad. You're developing such a little attitude about things. You have opinions now on what thing you wear and what things you want to do. You are becoming more and more independent as each day goes on.

We recently had to let you cry again at night because we had let you get into a routine over the holidays (due to all our life changes) of crying at night and us coming in to comfort you. When it got up to about 4-6 times a night, we decided we needed to do something. We let you cry without coming in one night. It only took one night this time, but I still wanted you to know my heart here. I want you to know that above many things, your dad and I have paid extra attention to being intentional with you. One way we've done this is with trying to help develop your independence. As you get older, your independence will look different. Right now, it's going to sleep in your own room & being able to put yourself back to sleep as well as being able to go to the sitter or be with your grandparent's without us. It's playing on your own for a little while each day. Later, it will be choosing your own clothes and picking up your own room. It will grow and change as you do. One day you'll bathe yourself and do your own chores. Finally, you will make decisions about your life without us. You will move out and move on and become an adult. We hope to be introducing things to you now that help you to develop on this path to independence in a healthy way.

When we get to that point when you're a teenager and you're needing to make some decisions on your own, you may need to remind me, "Mom, you helped me become independent on purpose. Let me make these choices on my own." And I'll probably laugh, maybe need a minute to think about it, but ultimately yes. I'm building towards that on purpose. Your dad and I had a whole conversation today about how to intentionally affirm and model certain behaviors for you so that you set high expectations for yourself so that when you begin making decisions about boys, or later men, in your life, that you are making wise, independent decisions there as well.

I pray daily for wise choices in your life. I pray for the person you are now and the person you will become. I pray for wisdom and for grace. I pray that you look at the world with a servant's heart. I pray that you will never treat others as less than yourself. I pray that you will be honest and sincere, a woman of integrity. A woman of peace. I pray that by teaching you moment by moment to be independent and someone who can think for herself and behave in a way that is in line with what she knows to be Truth, will help you to make these wise choices and will help you to become that woman who can one day be proud to say that her parents intentionally helped her to become who she is. I already am so proud of you.



The Planet Pink said...

Giving her wings so someday she can fly. Well done mama. Keep it up.

Adriel (The Mommyhood Memos) said...

Oh yes, I can so relate! Levi is SO independent right now. ME is fast becoming a F.U.W. (frequently used word!!) and he wants to do everything himself. I love it and loathe it at times... but ultimately, yes, this is what want. To allow him to become his OWN little man and to make his own good choices.

Mama Smors said...

Very sweet letter! Isis sounds so much like Ivy~ I can relate to the good times and the tough times of having a little one with a lot of spunk :) I miss your blog!

Adrienne said...

Sweet letter. She's beautiful!

softnails said...
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Coupon Addic said...

So sweet! They grow way too fast.

vanita said...

wow, in a blink of an eye, she's all grown up! i know it's hard letting her cry, but i think you did the right think, for both her and your sanity. you're doing a wonderful job mama!

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