A letter to my pregnant self

This is a part of a series of guest posts for first time moms that I have put together from a variety of moms with a variety of perspectives. This one is written by Adriel of The Mommyhood Memos. Please stop by her blog to read more of her posts. You can also follow The Mommyhood Memos on Twitter or in her BlogFrog community!

Dear Adriel,

You are becoming a mom. Finally, after 32 long years your dream is coming true! And guess what? It’s going to be even better than you imagined.

I know that right now it seems like pregnancy will never end… but enjoy these last days. Soon—when he’s not all tucked up safely inside of you—you will have to share that precious boy with the world.

Don’t stress about him coming too early or too late. I know you’re concerned about your parents flying in from overseas and being there for Levi’s big debut… But your clever little one will actually be one of the few babies that decide to come on his due date. Isn’t that fun?

{What you couldn’t have known then.}

As his birthday approaches, I want to tell you a few things that I’ve learned since then. I hope you’re taking notes, because this stuff is good.

First of all, I know you’ve heard it a thousand times… but seriously, hear it one more time: life is about to drastically change. Don’t worry, you’ve prepared as best as you possibly can. But just know that you can’t fully prepare for the best parts of life… like this one.

{You were made to give birth.}

The day of Levi’s birth is going to be so incredible. It will be hard work, but you will sail through it. You are much tougher than you sometimes give yourself credit for. In fact, most all women are. You were made to bear children… and soon you will get to see that in reality. You have nothing to fear, nothing to be anxious for.

{There will be a change of plans.}

I’m sorry to break it to you, but Levi’s birth will not be un-medicated, or in the birthing pool, or most of the ways you’re imagining it right now. You know that little inkling that he might be breech and you could possibly end up having a C Section? Well, let’s just call that a mother’s intuition, because… you’re right.

Of course you won’t discover this until twelve hours into labor, but don’t be afraid. You’ll handle it beautifully, with grace and confidence. God knows that you can handle it; He’s promised to never let you go through anything you can’t handle, remember?

{Remember to look beyond yourself.}

In those moments when you’re first told the news, remember to tell your midwife that you love her and you’re not mad at her for misinterpreting Levi’s position correctly in time to move him. She will be feeling incredible disappointment and failure in that moment… and she, too, will need some reassurance and encouragement.

She’ll later tell you how much your sweet attitude and response meant to her. Because as much as everyone tells you this day is about you and your sweet boy, the reality is that many others around you will also be effected by this miracle of life and how you bring your son into the world. Birth is holy, treat is as such.

{Prepare to behold glory.}

The surgery itself will go quickly and smoothly and the doctors and their teams will do just as great as your midwife would have done. It will be different, but no less amazing. They’ll take wonderful care of you.

More importantly, be prepared to meet the most gorgeous being you’ve ever laid eyes on. (And on that note, no need to worry about your baby being cute or not… He is seriously as cute as they come... everyone says so.) You will look at his face and finally know:

This is what glory looks like.

And even though you won’t get to hold him straight away like you had always envisioned, when you do finally hold him any of the disappointment from the change of plans will feel small and petty as it melts away in the wonder of that moment.

{Be anxious about nothing.}

And about breastfeeding... Yes, you’ve heard all the horror stories and you’re prepared for the worst. Your willingness to try as hard as you can and your commitment to persevere through those first few difficult weeks as you try everything in your power to make it work is noble and wonderful.

But guess what?

You are one of the lucky ones who finds breastfeeding a breeze. So let’s just forget those worries now. No need for them. During those first moments of holding your dear son on your chest, he will easily find his way and begin nursing naturally. It will be as if you’ve always been together.

The ease of breastfeeding will be grace to you amidst the mixed emotions that come with your unplanned surgery. Enjoy it and give thanks for it.

{Let yourself be taken care of.}

Now about going home... You’re going to need to stay in the hospital for five days due to a mild infection. As much as this doesn’t sound ideal to you right now, please know that it is. We all know your inclination to try and be superwoman, but this is not the time. You really do need to take it easy and let others take care of you. Being in the hospital will gently force this upon you. This, too, is grace to you. Embrace it and enjoy being served. Receive.

You do need to be warned, however, that in Australia husbands aren’t allowed to stay overnight with you in the hospital. I know this is different to home, and it understandably hard, but you can handle this. During those five long nights you will enjoy some precious moments with your son, just the two of you. Do you best to look on the bright side. Your homecoming day will come soon.

{Don’t stress about your recovery.}

You know what they say about recovering from a C Section, and so it’s no surprise that you will be frustrated by the prospect. But this is another area that’s not as bad as you might have been led to believe. Within a few days of being home you’ll be ready for some short day trips, and by week three you’ll be able to drive again. Yes, there’s some lingering pain and you have to be careful, but you most certainly won’t be an invalid and you won’t even be housebound… so let’s just dispel that fear right now so that you can enjoy the afterglow of your son’s birth.

{Love: madly, deeply.}

Be prepared to love like you’ve never loved before. You are going to have moments where you’re singing to that little boy, or even just looking at him from across the room while someone else takes a turn holding him… and it will feel as if your heart will explode with a deeper love than you’ve ever experienced.

You’ll begin to understand the love of God in a deeper way, you’ll fall in love with your husband in a more profound way, and of course you’ll love your little boy enough to honestly want to give your life for him if need be.

It’s a fierce, strong, solid love that’s decorated with sweetness and laughter and more kisses-on-the-toes than you ever dreamed possible. It's a love that will drive you to miss him when he's tucked up safely sleeping. A love that cause you to gaze at his photo when you can't look at his face before you. A love that feels eternal and timeless and extravagant and pure. A love that begins to define you anew.

{You will step onto a roller coaster.}

But along with those highs there will be things that stretch you at the core of who you are as a woman. Insecurities will be revealed that you don’t even realize are lurking under the surface of your smile. There will be moments when fears that are new and foreign to you will seem to come out of nowhere and corner you in the dark.

You need to know that you can handle all of it. You are as ready as you’ll ever be. With the help of your husband and God and the loved ones around you, you will learn to ask for help, you will learn humility, you will learn patience, and you will learn to trust yourself more than you ever have yet.

{Having a child will grow you.}

As magical as it is, being a new parent is difficult. There will be times when you don’t know what to do and times where you second guess yourself. In those moments you need to try and remember that you’re the mom… you really do know what’s best, even if your emotions are telling you otherwise. You might sometimes feel like you’re grasping at straws, but the good news is that you and your son and your family will all learn and grow together.

I also want to warn you about the times when you’ll want more than anything to trade jobs with your husband. There will be days when you want to call in sick… or at least take a lunch break or sign off at 5:00pm. Those days are especially difficult because the reality is that you simply can’t.

But the sooner you figure out how to get some time for yourself to refresh and recharge, the better you’ll be able to handle those days. You’ll work it out. Just be deliberate. And in the meantime, know that having those days and those thoughts doesn’t make you a bad mom.

{You are the expert.}

And lastly, I can’t emphasize this enough… Every child is different just as every mom is different. Trust yourself. Go with your gut. Listen to your intuition. If something doesn’t work, just try something else. There are no “rules” that you have to go by.

Parenting is—and should be—fluid and organic. One lesson learned will flow into the next. Listen to the advice from others, read the books and websites that you need to, but when it all boils down, remember that you’re the mom and you know what’s best.

{Wash your brain in this truth.}

You’re a great mom. You’re a great mom. You’re a great mom. This needs to be your new mantra.

Make sure that you don’t try to be perfect or you’ll make yourself feel miserable in your failed expectations. But do remember that perfect has nothing to do with great.

Sear it into your mind… carve it into your heart… write in on your hand… post-it note it around the house if you need to: You’re a great mom.

Love,

me xx

Bottle Feeding Blog

This is a part of a series of guest posts for first time moms that I have put together from a variety of moms with a variety of perspectives. This one is written by Jessica Dallas of Sexy Mama Manifesto. Please stop by her blog to read more of her posts. You can also follow Sexy Mama Manifesto on Facebook and Twitter.

I'd had a successful pregnancy and delivered a healthy, six-pound 12-ounce son. It never occurred to me that I would be unable to breast-feed my child.

I am a social worker by trade and a breast-feeding advocate. I strongly believe in the concept of human milk for human babies and love to spout off fun facts to my clients. For instance, “Did you know that Michael Jordan was breast-fed until he was three years old?” “Did you know that the average baby who is breast-fed for one year scores six IQ points higher than the average bottle-fed baby?” However, the best laid plans…

Perhaps it was triggered by the fluid loss from an unexpected Cesarean birth or the hormone fluctuations that commenced as soon as the baby was born, but I started to cry convulsively and could not seem to stop. For some moms this sort of thing might be viewed as a good thing—a catharsis or kriya and necessary cleansing to make way for new life. For yours truly, this was not the case.

I’ve been trained to keep a close watch on my emotional health just as many individuals might monitor their blood sugar levels. I have acquired a degree of normalcy in my life through careful vigilance—mental-health support, regular yoga practice, a rigorous running schedule, prayer, meditation and my spiritual community. However, this approach had to be modified when I found out that I was pregnant.

I elected to discontinue my medication as well. I closely monitored my emotions and took my pregnancy one day at a time, as the saying goes. I told myself that, were things to become too extreme, I would be honest with my doctor and follow his recommendations as to whether to restart my medication.

The baby and I made it through nine months and three days unmedicated; then he was born. We had settled into our room that evening, only to find my “old pal” lurking in the shadows.

Statistics told me that I had three days after the child’s birth to return to my medication regimen in order to reduce my rate of relapse by 85%. Given that a relapse appeared to be underfoot, I elected to start my medication again and start my son on (gasp) formula. With some perspective, I can state that it proved far more beneficial for my son to have a sane bottle-feeding mama than a crazy, lactating one.

It is a difficult line to navigate, this business of taking care of one’s self, especially when a small life is concerned. For me, it truly came down to the principle of doing the least amount of harm and taking the same approach I would advise a dear friend to take.

Formula feeding does not have to be a horrid experience. It was my choice to take what had been given to me (unexpected events), accept them, and make the best possible decision.

Seventeen months and plenty of pediatrician visits later I can say that my son is in excellent physical health and benefited from the measures I took during and after pregnancy.

When faced with the abundance of literature advising you on how to attain perfect mommy status, give yourself a break, if you can… You will know, on a very fundamental level, what is best for your child, just as I did. And when in doubt, consult your pediatrician and/or OB/GYN. There’s no such thing as stupid questions for first time mom’s in a physician’s office.

Why It's Best to Have No Expectations

This is a part of a series of guest posts for first time moms that I have put together from a variety of moms with a variety of perspectives. This one is written by Liz of A Belle, A Bean & A Chicago Dog. Please stop by her blog to read more of her posts. You can also follow A Belle, A Bean & A Chicago Dog on Facebook & Twitter.

I'm so happy to be here today, taking part in Cameron's New Moms Tips Week!  I'm Liz, a 32 yr old mom of 2 girls, and my tips below are what I learned following the birth of my first daughter, four and a half years ago.

I firmly believe in the power of numbers, and the saying, "It takes a village."  Motherhood is like nothing else imaginable, and surrounding yourself with as many Mommy Friends as possible will be beneficial to you. 

This story is mine, just like yours will be uniquely you.  I hope you can take away a thing or two that will help in your New Mom Journey...

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Take a baby care class along with your child birth class - This would be my first tip for first-time moms-to-be.  So much of the emphasis and focus during your pregnancy is on your labor and delivery.  But during labor and delivery, you are surrounded by seasoned, trained professionals that guide you through the process.

A short 2 days later (or 96 hrs if a C-section), you are sent home with this tiny, new creature and left to survive the wilds that is parenthood all.on.your.own. 

I promise - a baby care class will be worth your while!

Don't assume breastfeeding will be easy - Sure, it's "natural" and what Mother Nature intended, but don't expect that the first (or even twentieth) time you put your newborn to your breast, that your baby will perfectly latch on and happily suck away.

Trust your mama instincts - The moment your child enters the world, you are a mom.  And along with that single, defining moment comes your mama instincts. 

If something doesn't seem right, just ask.  Your intuition is more insightful than you realize.

Don't hesitate to call your pediatrician's office you have questions - I really wasn't aware of all the services offered by most every pediatrician.  During office hours, you can call in and just ask to speak to a nurse who will either answer your questions or let you know if you are better off bringing in your baby to be seen by your doc. 

Also, most ped's offices have after-hours lines.  Typically, you call your ped's office, which is forwarded to an answering service, and you leave a message with them.  A nurse will call you back shortly.

Your baby will be seen by someone from your ped's office while still in the hospital, so your baby is a patient from that point in time.  Even if you haven't been into the office yet to see your ped for a well-baby visit, don't hesitate to call if you have a question!

=The 4 points above all factor in to my first-time mom newborn story=

When I was pregnant with my first child, I desperately wanted to breastfeed. 

Kate was born full-term, weighing in at 6 lbs 9 ozs., and we were discharged without as much as a peep that our teeny baby was jaundiced.

As a breastfeeding mom, you are repeatedly told that it can take 3-5 days for your milk to come in, and that your baby is getting what they need until then.

We got home from the hospital, and after one night and the following morning, Kate had not had a wet diaper.  I did not take a baby care class, but remembered reading somewhere about the maximum number of hours a newborn could safely go without having a wet diaper. 

Kate was absolutely beyond that point.

Craig first called back to the hospital, and the nurse again reiterated that it takes a while for a mom's milk to come in.  But it just didn't sit right with me.

A few hours later, I called the after-hours line at my ped's office, and spoke to a nurse.  I will never forget hearing her words, "Oh honey, you need to get that baby to a hospital!"

At that point, I handed the phone to Craig, tears streaming down my face. 

He finished up with the nurse and we headed to the children's hospital.

Long story, short - Kate was jaundiced and severely dehydrated. 

I won't get into the hell that was our time there...just that we spent 4 days in the kids' hospital before going home for good.

*Also, I want to add that my experience is far from the norm.  Most new parents take their baby home and there are no complications whatsoever.  Just make sure to ask questions and go with your gut if you feel uneasy. 

"Baby Blues" are very real, and in my case, so is P.P.D. - After you deliver your baby, your hormones level drop quickly and drastically, thus the source of the Baby Blues.  I had read all about the Baby Blues, what the symptoms were, and how they can last for 3 weeks after delivery. 

What I don't remember is exactly when I told Craig that I was concerned it was more than just the Baby Blues, but it turned out that I was suffering from Post-Partum Depression. 

Until I was diagnosed with PPD and began telling others about it, I was unaware with how - dare I say - "common" it is.  I think too many people still feel like it isn't a topic that is OK to talk about.  However, I found that someone in every circle of my life either experienced it themselves or had a close friend or family member who did. 

When I started Zoloft, I was still breastfeeding (although I had to supplement, too, due to her jaundice and dehydration).  I was hellbent on nursing my baby.  I was also pumping after each feeding in order to increase my milk supply.

Unfortunately, it wasn't enough.

Between nursing, followed by pumping and adding in my anxiety caused by the PPD, I wasn't eating or drinking.  I dropped all my baby weight in 2 weeks, and my milk dried up.

I had obviously been supplementing with formula, but I still had been hoping to eventually breastfeed exclusively.  However, it just wasn't going to happen for me.

There is a lot of emphasis placed on breastfeeding today.  And while I do believe it is natural and has more benefits than even the top formula, it simply is NOT for everybody.  Further, women who choose to move to formula should not feel guilty about it. 

Another point to consider would be that my generation is primarily formula fed because breastfeeding wasn't "in vogue" in the 70's.  And my mom, who is a child of the 50's, has joked with me, "God only KNOWS what was in OUR formula back then!"

The fact of the matter is this: Babies have been raised on formula for GENERATIONS, and have thrived and grown into healthy, intelligent, productive adults.  So if breastfeeding isn't for you, don't beat yourself up!  Happy moms make for happy babies!

I guess if I had to sum it up in 1 overall tip it would be: DON'T have any expectations.  There is no way to know what life's going to be like once that tiny human is placed in your arms, so don't put more pressure on yourself by thinking things have to be a certain way.  Just take it day by day, and do what feels right.

Best of luck on your new journey called mommyhood!

Newborn Daze: Tips & Unsolicited Advice from a Dr. Mom

This is part of a series of guest posts for first time moms that I have put together from a variety of moms with a variety of perspectives. This one is written by Melissa of Confessions of a Dr. Mom. Please stop by her blog to read more of her posts. You can also follow Confessions of a Dr. Mom on Twitter.

Becoming a Mother and welcoming your first child into the world is such an amazing life altering event. You've probably read countless books, heard an inordinate amount of advice, and may even wonder...am I ready? Well...don't worry, the moment you see, hear, and touch your precious baby for the first time all your doubt will melt away.  I'm here today to share with you a few key tips that I learned through my (mis)adventures during the newborn days in the hopes that this type of (un)solicited advice comes in handy...hence, my first tip:

• You will get tons of advice, some will be unsolicited...take it all with a grain of salt.  It can actually be a good thing but keep in mind that what may work for one may not work for you. This is why it helps to get tips and advice from various friends and resources, it will expose you to a variety of experiences.

• Have a plan but don't be a slave to it. This applies to your birth plan, your feeding plan, your sleeping plan, and pretty much any plan you have.  For example, it's great to have a birth plan but prepare for an alternate one, just in case. I knew with my first that I wanted an epidural and would do almost everything in my power to not have a c-section. But, I also allowed myself the option to opt out if my or my baby's health was at stake. Luckily, I didn't have to do that but at least my mind was open to it.

• Decide how you will feed your baby: Breast vs Bottle or somewhere in between. It's definitely a good idea to know ahead of time what your plan is. Again, it's also a good idea to have a back up plan here. I didn't and it cost me a whole lot of heartache.
• I was intent on breastfeeding, for all the obvious reasons.  However, I was not at all prepared for the difficulties I would face. Aside from the pain...which does eventually go away, my milk never came in. That was a devastating blow to me because this meant my baby needed formula.
• I never even considered that this could be an issue, I was heartbroken. So, yes, it caught me off guard and in the midst of all the sleep deprivation and post-partum hormones, I was an emotional wreck.  I don't say this to scare you, rather, to encourage you to be prepared in case feeding your baby doesn't necessarily go as planned.
• If you plan on breastfeeding, I think it's a good idea from the start to get set up with a lactation consultant. Most hospitals have them in the room right after delivery but just in case, don't forget to ask for one.  Read up on common problems and be prepared for them. Have some bottles and formula on hand at home, just in case.  I only say this because at my most desperate hour when I realized my baby needed something, anything...I had nothing and sent my hubby out in the middle of the night in search of bottles and formula (thank goodness for 24 hour Walmart).

• Have an idea about sleep training vs co-sleeping. Of course during the first few weeks with your newborn, you will essentially be on their schedule: feeding, cuddling/sleeping, and changing diapers.  It's a good idea to have a plan about where you would like your baby to sleep: with you (co-sleeping), in a bedside crib or bassinet, or in a separate room in a crib.
• Here is another area I was completely caught off guard. Although I knew I wanted my baby close by for ease of feeding, I actually hadn't read much about co-sleeping.  I had a bedside bassinet where I hoped my bundle of joy would sleep and then eventually his crib. Guess what? Dear, sweet baby boy had other plans...and oh boy...were we in for a major change up.
• Again, my mistake here was not having a back up plan. Remember when I said, every baby is different and what works for one may not work for another? Well, my son would have none of the sleeping alone...noooo....this boy required my arms all.day.long.  Eventually, I listened to his cues and learned to give him what he needed and we ended up co-sleeping. I only wish I had been open to it sooner.
• That being said, many babies are amenable to sleep training though I wouldn't start until at least 4 months old or older. You just have to decide what will work best for your family based on your baby's temperament.

• Read about common newborn skin conditions. This will help minimize your worry within the first few weeks.  Babies can get so many different looking rashes and skin irritations that it's easy for moms to mistake it for illness or allergies.  Of course, if ever in doubt, contact your pediatrician.
• Here are a few very common newborn skin conditions to read up on:  skin peeling (very common on hands and feet of a newborn), erythema toxicum (very common rash that looks like tiny red bumps), neonatal acne (just like it sounds except it will go away without any scarring), milia (tiny whiteheads), and stork's kiss (red splotchy birthmark) just to name a few. All of these are nothing to worry about and go away on their own.

• Ask for help.  Now is not the time to be shy. Taking care of a newborn is one of the hardest things you'll ever do. If your mom, mother in law, sister asks how they can help, tell them.  It would be nice not to have to worry about dinner, the dishes, the laundry while you get accustomed to your new little bundle.  Just make sure you're clear:  you need help with the chores and could use an extra set of arms while you go take a shower.  Their time with your baby will come...now it's your time.

• Prepare for the unexpected.  This is worth repeating...meaning don't be afraid to change up the plan. It will help you be more flexible and adjust to your baby's needs. If something is not working, know when to change direction...it's okay and you will save yourself a lot of undue stress.

• Tune in and listen to your mommy intuition.  I put this one last because above all, I hope you will remember this one. You can read every parenting, sleep training, guide to breastfeeding book out there but the most important tool at your disposal is your Mommy Intuition. We all have it. It took me awhile to tune in and listen to it, but when I finally did...I relaxed knowing that although many of my best laid plans had to be thrown out the window, I was doing what was best for my baby.

Resources I like and why

• The Happiest Baby on the Block by Harvey Karp, M.D.
• Why I like it: Great book on how to comfort your baby by using the 5 S's : swaddling, side position, shh sounds, swinging, and sucking. This book was easy to read, made sense and provided useful insight into why our babies cry.
• Eat, Sleep, Poop by Scott W. Cohen, M.D., F.A.A.P
• This is a new book serving as a common sense guide to baby's first year. I love Dr. Cohen's common sense approach and how all his recommendations and insights are also based on first hand experience with his daughter. Though there are a few things in the book that didn't work for me with my firstborn, they worked for Dr.Cohen and he provides sound advice on most issues you will encounter with your baby during the first year.
• Askdrsears.com
• Why I love this site:  Dr.Sears has a comprehensive web site that pretty much covers most issues you will face with your newborn. Honestly, his advice has gotten me through some extremely tough times. His sections on co-sleeping and breastfeeding are excellent.
• aap.org:  This is the American Academy of Pediatrics web site
• Here you will find recommendations about sleep safety, breastfeeding, pretty much anything regarding babies to teens. This is a great resource to find the latest safety guidelines on pediatric issues.

Congratulations and best wishes as you embark on this wonderful new journey into motherhood.  Above all, cherish this time with your baby. Although there will be those days you wish would just come to an end and the sleepless nights are taking their toll, try to remember it won't last forever. The memories you make with your baby now however, will last a lifetime.

How to Keep Your Sanity as a New Mom

This is a part of a series of guest posts for first time moms that I have put together from a variety of moms with a variety of perspectives. This one is written by Alexes of One Cluttered Brain. Please stop by her blog to read more of her posts. You can also follow One Cluttered Brain on Facebook and Twitter.

I remember being pregnant with my first baby like it was yesterday. She is turning 11 years old next week and I still remember holding her in my arms as a wee baby. I didn't know anything as a new mom. All I knew, is that this baby girl that I held in my arms was mine and that I loved her. I think that is enough to get you through the HARD days. I have put together a few tips for all you "new" moms that will be experiencing the miracle of life in a few months.

• Sleep when the baby sleeps. (No doubt about this one. Don't try and run around and clean or do dishes or anything like that. Just sleep at first. You will get the hang of this eating/sleeping/diaper changing soon.)
• Don't fret if you can't breastfeed your baby. (You've tried and you've tried and still nothing will work. Don't feel like a failure. You can still feed your baby formula and believe it or not, the formula will provide nutrition to your child!)
• Let others help you out during the first few months. (Being a first time mom sometimes it is hard to keep up with everything. Meals brought over to your house by friends sometimes just make your day. And might make your husband's day too, because after a L-O-N-G day at work, I doubt he feels ready to cook dinner for you. Mine didn't. Maybe you married a chef or something.)
• Learn to say "No." (Sometimes, when we have a new baby, we also can get bombarded with visitors. If you are not feeling up enough for visitors just say so. Don't feel bad. If you and your baby just need a "day" to yourselves then just do it. They can visit tomorrow.)
• Don't forget your husband. (I know that sometimes this is easy to do when you have a new little one that demands so much of your attention, but remember that he helped to create that bundle of joy you hold in your arms. Let him take care of the baby at times too. 
• Schedule " Intimacy." (Sometimes after the baby comes sex gets pushed out the window. Don't let it. Your husband is still your sweetheart and he loves you. He needs to feel needed.)

I hope that these tips help you during your first year as a Mom! Oh the joy you have the first day you hold your little one! Don't forget to take lots and lots of pictures!! :)

New Mom Tips!

"I'm feeling better!"

Ah ladies, yes I am still here!! It's been a crazy week with the start of student teaching, Isis' first sickness & then I'm in a wedding next weekend, so there were lots of bachelorette festivities this weekend! But I am definitely getting things worked out & Isis is feeling better! No more fever, but still some congestion. The doctor said that could stick around for a week or so, but it's getting a little better each day! Thank you SO much for all your advice about dealing with congestion! I've definitely implemented several of your tips & it has really helped!!

Speaking of advice, I've been excited about this coming week because I've got 5 beautiful bloggers who are going to be sharing some guest posts with all of you! This will give me another week to get used to my new crazy schedule! I also think they've got such great perspectives & stories to share! I really hope you enjoy their tips! Below are my top 5 new mom tips!

1. Sleep when the baby sleeps

Everyone says this & at first, it was really hard for me to do this, especially when I was home by myself with Isis once Lewis went back to work. I was scared something would happen & I would be asleep. But once I started taking advantage of the excess sleepiness of newborns, I felt a lot better both day & night!

2. Accept help, but also know when to say no

Hopefully you will be lucky enough to have several people who would love to help you in this new hectic time of your life! I had several people who were willing to bring me casseroles or come do my dishes & laundry real quick & even a couple of people who knew I was struggling with baby blues & just came over to watch a movie with me so that I wasn't alone. But at the same time, it can get overwhelming & it's important that you aren't afraid to say that today you just don't need any visitors for a little while. People will understand that those first few weeks are different for everyone.

3. Don't worry about the schedule

Most of you know by now that I am a fan of scheduling. I think Isis has thrived from a consistent, although flexible routine & I know that I have had a much better time knowing what she needs & knowing what to expect by having a routine. You don't have to be crazy with it. We really aren't robots, but the routine helps. But at the same time, those first few weeks at home, just focus on bonding & sleeping when you can & making sure the baby is getting full feedings when they are hungry. I tried not to set up bad habits, but I also just tried to go with it. Days & nights are mixed up for a while & you'd get too stressed out trying to stick to any sort of routine at the beginning.

4. Differentiate day & night

Days & nights are going to be mixed up. I already said that. There's not much you can do about it. The only thing I tried to do in the very beginning was really differentiate day from night. At night, we were quiet, kept things really dark, still cuddled & stuff, but were just really slow & quiet about everything. During the day, I tried to keep it bright & cheerful & I talked with more animation & tried to let her know that this was daytime & playtime (to a certain extent - you can only play so much with a  newborn). In my opinion this helped transition her pretty quickly to get days & nights down, but there could be several other strategies for this.

5. Don't be afraid to talk about baby blues

If you are one of the lucky ones who don't get the baby blues, then that is absolutely awesome!!! I truly hope that no mom gets them, but the reality is that 75-80% of new moms will face some form of baby blues & about 20% will struggle with postpartum depression. I definitely faced the baby blues, but it never continued to PPD, but both are fairly common. It doesn't mean you're a bad mother. It doesn't mean you have anything to be embarrassed or ashamed of. Baby blues is just an abundance of hormones that haven't evened out! PPD is hormones mixed with several other factors that I won't even pretend I am fully informed about, but I do know that if you're struggling with either or both, it's okay to talk to someone about it. I started by talking to friends & family about my baby blues. I also mentioned it to my nurse-midwife at my 2 week appointment & then she asked me about it again at my 6 week appointment. So just don't hold it in if you are struggling with that. You are definitely not alone & there is so much support available!

Overall just try to take this time to really bond & enjoy these first weeks with your baby! Things will get easier & harder as it goes on, but I've found it to ultimately be the hardest & most rewarding experience of my life. I'm actually having some major baby fever at just 8 months into motherhood! That may not be normal, but what you'll realize as you become a new mother as well is that normal is relative & what is "normal" for you may not be "normal" for someone else. So definitely listen to advice & tips, but take what works for you & leave the rest. This is ultimately your journey & I think it's a beautiful thing that the journey looks so different to each of us!

Congratulations new moms!!

Guest Post from a Friend!

(Me & Kristen on the far right)

My friend Kristen graduated from the College of Education with me in May! Although she's actually completed her student teaching & I'm just starting mine! Either way, she shared some of her recent thoughts with me on motherhood & the future & I thought it was interesting to hear her perspective! I decided to share some of her writing as a guest post on my blog! She's also writing for a local website! Check out some more of her stuff & maybe share your thoughts on her perspective below!

Now that I have graduated from college and been hurled into the real world, all of the social pressures I have successfully avoided for four years are looking me right in the eye. It seems like every other day I hear about someone becoming engaged or pregnant. At this rate, in a matter of weeks I will be the only single girl left.

The mere thought of getting married and starting a family is terrifying. That probably has a lot to do with the fact that I’m still figuring out my life, so maybe I’ll feel better about all this in a few years. I’m only 22! That’s young, right? Please don’t tell my Mom, but I’m not even 100% sure I want to have kids. Admitting that makes me feel extremely guilty. It is 2010, I shouldn’t feel guilty about that! Did the feminist movement overlook me somehow? Or did I overlook the feminist movement?

Babies are adorable. Isis is simply the cutest thing ever. But if I had one of my own, I really don’t think I would know what to do with it. As a young woman, I’m embarrassed to admit that I have never changed a baby’s diaper. I swear every girl I talk to knows how to take care of a baby. Was there a class in high school I was never told about? My guidance counselor must have missed that one. Now I’m doomed to forever be that girl who doesn’t know what to do with a baby.  

Strangely enough, after reading Cameron’s blog, I have decided that I would like a drug free labor and I would like to use cloth diapers. Don’t ask me why I’ve decided these things before I’ve even decided to have children, maybe Cameron is just very persuasive. My choice of a drug free labor has a lot to do with the fact that I’m pretty horrified of needles. I will do anything to avoid that epidural needle. Using cloth diapers just makes sense to me. It’s economical and environmentally friendly.

Is there anyone out there who once felt the same way I do?

Isis is sick.

We made it almost 8 months with no sickness at all! I was starting to think my breastmilk was magical! But alas, it is not. Of course my first day of student teaching would be the day she finally gets sick. Lewis noticed she seemed different this morning. She woke up in the middle of the night last night & he also knew then that she wasn't feeling well. This morning he said she was quiet & had a runny nose & her eyes were all red. We both thought it was allergies, but when I picked her up from the babysitter's house today after school got out, I thought she had a fever. 

We ended up going to the doctor & she had a fever of 101.3!! She has an upper respiratory viral infection, so no antibiotics. Just Tylenol. Poor little thing is finally wanting to cuddle & be held & I can't cuddle her all day! So funny that just a week or so ago I was reading Livy's blog as she talked about her little one being sick & finally wanting to be cuddled again! Now I am where she was, but I have to continue student teaching, so I can't cuddle Isis all day tomorrow. Again, SO thankful to have a wonderful babysitter that I trust & that Isis is absolutely loving!! It's very helpful in situations like this!

By the way, did I mention she threw up all over me tonight? It was our first vomit situation. It was not my favorite. I almost cried - not because it was on me, but rather because Isis got really upset about it. Seriously, poor thing!!! I just want to go get her out of her crib & cuddle her right now! But she was exhausted when we put her to bed. I know she needs to sleep.

So any tips for helping a baby girl with a stuffy nose?

How do you comfort your kids when they're sick?

Market Mommies Featured Blogger!

I just realized I'm the featured blogger at Market Mommies this week! I knew it was coming up soon, but didn't know it was this week!!

Go check it out!!

Orientation!

This is the face I had to leave this morning!

Today was my orientation day at school. All the student teachers came in to get our syllabus & all our instructions for what is expected this semester. It's definitely a lot!! I was a little overwhelmed, but I immediately started color-coding my calendar to prepare for due dates & seminars I have to attend! I think I'll do pretty well with this! 

Isis did great with her babysitter, Hannah today! I was already gone when Hannah got there, but Lewis said that Isis immediately recognized her from all the times she's babysat already & she had a big smile on her face as soon as Hannah walked in! Then Hannah left the room & Isis got upset, so that's all a good sign! She napped well & ate well & overall things were just great!

So now here I am, still with a list of about 4 things I need to get done before I can go to bed. My hair is in a towel from taking a shower, I still need to pick out my clothes for tomorrow (yes Mama Hen, I'll be wearing flats!! I actually bought this great new comfy pair from Target & thought of you when I bought them!), I need to fold some clothes & I need to wind down by watching a Friends episode or something! I've got some posts I've been working on for this week, but I'm having to do blog stuff in these in-between moments where I have a second to sit down! As soon as I get in a groove, life will go more smoothly. Right now I'm very thankful & excited about my lovely guest bloggers for next week! They'll be sharing their new mom tips!!

Finally, I need to say how incredibly thankful I am for my blog friends. Seriously you have no idea how much it meant to know that I had a big day today, but all I had to do was check back on this post & my email inbox to see lots of great "good luck" comments & encouragement!! I am so humbled by the friendships I've made through blogging! I promise that although my posting may drop back to more like 3 or 4 times a week for a little while, I'm still here & I still so greatly appreciate each & every one of you!!